I kick Adrian Peterson into the black hole and then turn it into a wormhole, through which I send the path. I place a fleet of starships to fight any intruders -including me- and then go back through the wormhole shortly before the Earth's gravity well destroys the wormhole completely.
I shoot superman with a kryptonite-filled shrapnel shell. I grow a Tiberium colony, set a swarm of combat drones armed with cutting fields and antimatter missiles to patrol the place, string up a network of orbital ion cannons and activate several huge force-field layers which will reflect any form of laser or kinetic weapon and will be utterly unaffected by plasma.