Well...I'll post my poetry contest entry nao.
I Look But I See Nothing
I look into the bathroom mirror,
But all I hear is the shrill laughter.
Disembodied voices follow me,
Everything I do they will see.
The feeling of being watched,
Causes my soul to be dislodged.
I fret over every grain of sand,
In this unending wasteland.
The lake's surface has only bright lights,
I don't see myself in sight.
I was never here, I was never there,
And you question where where where.
I don't know me and I may never will,
The curtains fall and all is still.
I'm just another person in the crowd,
But my name none can say out loud.
I see things I should never do,
When time blurred and distrust grew.
Those words scratch on my walls,
They burn my eyes as they scrawl.
I'm lost in the wilderness I've created,
My breathe all gone and abated.
I'm trying to feel my way through,
Through the gaps my soul flew.
I seek the comforting heat and flames,
But I get the frigid stares and blames.
This is the last time I'll trust,
Empty promises and words that rust.
Flesh and bone but I feel ethereal,
No friends at my pauper's funeral.
Unremembered and forgotten inside,
Never really born, never really died.
Time to stop this bottling up,
Pour my remnants in a paper cup.
Too long have I tried to hold the dam,
An emotional wreck is what I am.
Cause I struggle with the uneasiness,
In a state of painful wretchedness.
I will not mention these secrets,
Lest they morph to bitter regrets.
I used to have this protection,
But not now I've veered off direction.
I scream my throat dripping raw,
Till it burns and aches my jaw.
Tender ribs hide the palpitating,
By God give me some explaining.
I blanch at the barely-hidden callousness,
The dripping water swirls the gloominess.
I'm a refuge in my own body,
I've created all my sorry follies.
I cannot see my face in the reflection,
It's all a God damn fabrication.
I tried to sew up the broken stitches,
Yet I was drinking with the witches.
I lead a complex double life,
And it presented me only with strife.
I cannot find myself amidst the space,
I've been down and I've lost the race.
I've peeled away all the masks,
But still I endlessly moan and ask.
I'm a peculiar stranger to all,
I'm trapped between the call and fall.
Even they have abandoned me,
And from myself I turn and flee.
Long have I been running and escaping,
Always on the road, always searching.
I'd break down before my hair's grey,
I'd scream but my shadow has none to say.
I'm still surprised I didn't fall to my knees,
In this solid prison of make believe.
Or perhaps it's a room of the real,
And it's not a case of self-derail.
Slipping out of the back door,
My eyes burn a hole in the floor.
I'm on a futile never ending quest,
Finding me is merely Satan's Test.
I have not a face but a marble slate,
Perhaps it was meant to be my fate.
I've looked so hard but its still zero,
Tried, but I failed playing the hero.
I have no known identity,
I have lost all plausible history.
I'm lost in this wide sordid paradise,
Nothing I do seems to suffice.
I still cannot see my face,
I still cannot find my self,
I still cannot make out the features,
I still cannot see the reflection,
I am the nameless one.
