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Fortunately, he still has many extra lives, and respawns

UNFORTUNATELY, HE RESPAWNS MILES AWAY, IN MONGILIA

Fortunately, you have a teleporter.

Fortunately, he is intelligent enough to make his own teleporter

Unfortunately, he made a fatal flaw when making the teleporter, causing it to explode when you went through. You are now stranded with him and the explosion took his arm.

Unfortunately, the arm that was holding the ammunition was the one that got exploded.

Fortunately, the ammunition survived the explosion

Fortunately, the Martians decided to lend a hand and send the ammunition back to you.

Unfortunately, they are literally shooting us with the ammunition D:

Fortunately, the ammunition auto targets wrens, so the martians killed them for us.

Unfortunately, their next target is you and your one-armed friend.

Fortunately, only wrens are affected by the gun. Everyone else hit by it gets a health and speed boost, AND invulnerability to everything harmful to them for 1 minute.

Unfortunately, the boosts are so overpowered they will overflow your stats, causing some of them to become negative or uncontrollably high, so it's not a good idea to get hit

Fortunately, the negative effects only lasts for 5 seconds.

Unfortunately you forgot most of the past information (as you had just walked in on this debacle) and you continue to panic long after the negative effects have worn off.